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Monday, June 25, 2012

First the Skunk now a Raccoon?

Another wonderful Friday,

Friday night is my fav night to sleep. I could be up until 2 or 3 in the morning but knowing that I don't have been up at 5:30 am should make it the best sleep-in day wake up at 2 am with your dog snarling and barking. You're hoping your dreaming but being scared awake and attempting to run towards the noise before your eyes are even fully open, can cause a problem. Then you find out that your sleepiness is not the only problem at all but it's the Raccoon hanging out in your kitchen.

I know that raccoons are ballsy but really? He could barely fit is fat fluffy body through the window which is more than likely one of the reasons Cali woke up. She's the one who patrols while Whiskey would sooner bark from the bedroom while hiding under the bed, he didn't even do that though. ( I wish he was hiding under something last weekend from the Skunk ) so the raccoon squeeeezes himself back out the window ( That looked like it too effort ) and stands on the deck almost laughing at us or weezing because he's a porker. Half the house is up and perched in the crack of the open window staring at him.

All we need now is a coyote and a bear and we've had our fill of the wildlife here. Considering there's not much space left for them and a fast food buffet on every corner I can see why they hand out in town but you don't have to be IN my house! The funny thing is that it's like EVERYONE thought they were dreaming even though they got up out of bed to come check it out.

Now aside from Choo being staked out in the yard with a paintball gun instead of the tranqualizer gun he wanted so he can tag the critters and hopefully scare them off. We tried other ways to get rid of them, ok minimally. We have even spoken to someone we know at the Vancouver Wildlife Rescue and even the things she told us to do HAVE NOT worked! These guys are immune to everything! Repellant, Cayanne Pepper, dogs, people... They are like mutant creatures sent here specifically to drive me crazy!

Really they're out to get me...

Every night at dusk you can see feel their beady little eyes watching you, checking you out and just waiting for you to fall asleep.

So this has provoked me to make a T-shirt! Don't ask me how that happened, I have no idea but I can't let it go. I'm not sure what it's going to say yet so I've been asking people around me for ideas based on previous posts. I have a few myself and I'm asking you guys for your ideas. I know a few of you prefer to e-mail or message me on Facebook which is fine. Feel free to post a comment or idea here as well.

My favourite one so far is " Welcome to my Gong Show! " which I would wear proudly!

Anyway I'm starting to ramble now. If this weekend is anything like the last 2 I'm sure some crazy, rabid animal will again attack us and ruin some part of my Friday.

 Hey...maybe they just want to live with us too.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Catching up June 9 - 17

Another week came and went. Although I think I'm doing nothing some days I'm really doing something!It never stops.

The weekend after I went to Victoria for the conference I had a work picnic which was definitely cold for June but I had fun especially at the petting zoo in Queen Elizabeth Park. The bunnies, sheep, baby cow, peacocks and goats...ahhh the goats kept me occupied while we were freezing. Thank goodness it wasn't raining.

While Red was telling me " I must feel the wool on the baby sheep! "  baby goat #69 wandered up slammed his head into my calf and rubbed it there for like 2 full mins!
 Being a city girl and not around goats, like ever really, I'm sure the look on my face was one of sheer confusion and a bit of fear wondering why this was happening and I felt a little violated!

The day was good though and I survived through my allergies after we got home. My Jack Russell was very interested in where the goat had forced his scent on my leg and the funny thing was he growled at my calf.

The next Friday was the nightmare of my nightmares! I woke up did my usual thing to get ready for work. I went downstairs to let my dogs out and let Whiskey slid out first and after a few seconds let Cali out. I let them out the door at different times so they don't take off into a full run into the alley where a car or pedestrian could be walking by. Whiskey rounded the corner out of view and Cali took off into the center of the yard, so as I'm thinking about the last minute things I needed to do before going to work Whiskey comes tearing around the corner, chest bright yellow and the biggest skunk ever chasing him towards the house. At first I kind of didn't register what was going on until the skunk stop dead in front of me standing on the top stair tail fully flared.

Then the smell hit and and all I could think was "OOH CRAP..." Cali was still in the yard and hadn't seen the skunk yet! I stood frozen trying not to move when the skunk turned around and started lopping away. That's when Cali saw it thank goodness when I called her she came running.

By now I've decided I have to get the dogs on the balcony but the back stairs have been ripped off for repairs and the front door is locked so I HAD to take them through the house to get them up there because our yard isn't fenced.

NOTE TO SELF #1: No matter what...DO NOT take the dogs through the house!

By now I've decided that I'm not going to work because of the last time the dogs got sprayed by a skunk and I went to work.

NOTE TO SELF #2: DO NOT take the train to work thinking you don't smell really bad...cause you do!

After a ranting message to my Office manager about the skunk thing (I'm sure she was laughing ) I stayed home and set out to de-smell my dogs. Problem! it's 6:30 am and nothing opens until 9 or 10. Great so after waking up almost everyone in my house with every profane word I could spit out in a short period of time, the headache starting from my rage and the smell... we sat outside for about 3-4 hours.

In the end Cali never got sprayed but had to go through the whole process anyway ( What a trooper ), Whiskey still smells but not nearly as bad and I keep a serious lookout for the skunk.

Saturday, Sese and I went and saw Snow White and the Huntsman! AMAZING! I'd see it again and I never do that in Theater.

That made me happy! Lets see what this weekend brings. I've set deadlines for myself on the next 2 chapters I really hope the weekend is uneventful enough for me to complete them.

Monday, June 4, 2012

My Learning Experience in Victoria

I try to blog weekly, when I have a long lag between them it's usually because something came along and messed up my schedule. Thus causing minor instances where hitting my head repeatedly on the wall or screaming into my pillow, might be the only recourse I have to release the tension and frustration that has positioned itself in my life at that time.

Now besides the usual house issues, I had to go to an Admin conference in Victoria this past weekend. I've known for a few months that this was going to happen but yet I didn't worry about it until around Wed of last week then... the freaking out started.

First off I'm not a conference kind of girl but I had to represent my company and it was mandatory ( trust me I tried to get out of it ). I'm usual pretty good in situations with strangers and I knew no one there except 1 person that I've only spoken to on the phone and never met.

At first my boss wanted me to fly on a float plane over to the Island...a float plane...ya I'm not a good flyer either as in SCARED TO DEATH of flying in general. I have visions of plane crash situations that flash in my brain. I was all for giving it a shot though as long as Choo could come with me in case I lost my mind.

You know that Simpsons episode where Marg has to take a plane and for like a whole minute all you see is her blue hair running back and forth screaming " Let me off, let me off! " That's me minus the hair.

Our plans fell through though and we had to take a charter bus to the ferry terminal then into downtown Vic. While on the ferry we met a guy from Saskatchewan that was going to the island for a job interview. He packed all his stuff in a duffel bag, grabbed all his money and away he went. He was so amazed by the mountains and the ocean he said he was never going back to Sask.

We get downtown Victoria and grab a cab to the hotel which ends up only being like a 10 min walk from the bus station. Once we check my flight response kicks in and all I can think is, "How the hell can I get out of here!" They had a welcome reception for everyone less than an hour after I got there...well that was awkward. I walked in and everyone was in their respective groups because they had all met each other before. I walked in, everyone stopped talking, stared at me for a second then turned away and continued their previous conversations. So I hung out with the bartender until I found the person that was supposed to give me my name tag. The introductions began. I thought briefly about the bottle of whiskey sitting on the bar and decided it was probably best if I didn't get sloshed right away and make an ass out of myself.

Once everyone got there I had been speaking to a couple of people from across the country and started to feel better until they announced that we were going to be put into teams and go on a scavenger hunt as part of a team building exercise. Pressure to do well and not overstep while you put together the pecking order.

I have to say the hunt was fun! We were told we could use whatever we needed and we should be creative, that would add points to our final score. I didn't get to see the city in a way I could check stuff out but I learned about the history of the city which I promptly forgot once we got back to the hotel for the end of the reception.  So that was over YAH!!!

 Off to bed for a 7:30 start the next day for the

After the classes we went to dinner, another awkward moment when I walked in and again everyone looked at me and then went about their business. I sat down and soon everyone was conversing about the events from the previous night on the hunt. The whole time this is going on Choo is walking endlessly around the city taken in by all of the historical buildings, low and behold he found the guy from the ferry so he hung out with him while I was busy! At dinner they revealed who won the scavenger hunt and holy crap it was my team. I scored a big fluffy bathrobe so I didn't need to steal the one from the hotel as my kids begged me to do.

After dinner it was off to see Red one of my co-workers in our Vic office at the Bard and Banker Pub. I felt like I was betraying Irish, the receptionist at work because it was a Scottish pub then again Red's Scottish so it was all good. Choo had a slight issue because waitresses had skirts so short and an upper level they were working on that he had to switch places with me because every time he took a sip of his beer he was looking up at them. Then back to the hotel for bed and another early start for the wrap up breakfast.

Once breakfast was over, we checked out took a few pics and headed back to the bus to head home.

I survived!

I got back to Vancouver not even 5 mins after I stepped out of the station a bird pooped on me letting me know I was truly home. Sure don't poop on the homeless guys sleeping on the benches outside the bus station, then again they've probably had their share. Another hour and a half to home and everyone missed us except one of my cats seemed pissed that I left him in the care of the girls for the weekend. So he shunned me for the rest of the evening until his food dish was empty he was back in my lap demanding my attention.

So the weekend worked out ok, still not a conference type of girl but I learned alot.

 I learned something about myself too...

When in an awkward situation, I should go for the whiskey it's better after the whiskey.