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Wednesday, May 28, 2014

I Can See Your Nipples and So Can Everyone Else!

Ha I bet you thought you were going to see something else right? Well maybe it I can find the right image for the example you'll see someones nipples or not because the kids read this and like they want to see their mother posting pictures of nipples.

I work downtown and you can see a lot of weird things down there but not usually during the daytime unless they are homeless looking for cash but I saw not 1 but 3 girls wearing those knitted meshy tops with nothing underneath. I wish I took a picture so you could see what I'm talking about but that would have been creepy. Maybe less creepy that it was by a woman than a man but still creepy. Honestly I probably wouldn't have noticed except that one of them had very large boobs and you just can't miss that.

Brief flashback to the 80's and mesh tops but we had tank tops or bikini tops underneath you know the ones that guys would wear too sometimes, like this guy. 

Love the hair and the bandanna omg and the DOG COLLAR! Ugh...the 80's it's like a bad acid trip.

 Anyway...

So you can imagine ladies that walking around bra-less in a shirt with knitted holes is going to rub things the wrong way, or the right way but just looks completely wrong because the holes were in the perfect place to entice staring.

Now really it's like a car accident you can't look away from! My first reaction was "Am I seeing this right?"

My next one was "Don't look, don't look. Screw it I'm looking"

Then "Now I can't stop looking."

Last I giggled because it was funny to see the three of them walking up the street and almost every man in the vicinity in suits and ties doing double and triple takes of the nipple girl.

So to all my lovely beautiful girls out there I know you're all not the type to be parading nipples around but if you ever have the inclination to do something like that I might have to lock you up in a padded cell...forever...and duct tape your nipples.

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

When A Hole Is A Hole And Twins Are Ridiculous.

I hope you all had a good weekend!

It was pretty quiet in my little town. Barely any traffic and even emptier stores almost an eerie 'alien abducted my town' feeling. Some people were off camping and some at weddings while the weather couldn't make up it's mind on whether to rain or not the stormy feeling was there but not the actual storm we were expecting. An seeing as the work weeks here have been gorgeous and the weekends seem to suck we were praying to mother nature to shine a little light and she did in between dark looming clouds just to tease us outside for a stormy wind to make us go back in.

So we recap the week...um...hmm...OK!

Yesterday Lo and I had a little photo shoot with on of my stray kids Megan who is an aspiring photographer and can make any picture look amazing! We helped each other out. She gets more photos for her portfolio and we get pictures for our various needs. It was fun and it stopped raining long enough for the sun to come out briefly for us. Not to mention the old guy walking through the square that called Lo and I twins! We...are...so...not...twins she's like milk...and she actually drinks a lot of milk...whole milk. I'm surprised she doesn't weigh more than her tiny little self could carry. I am not like milk unless it's chocolate milk and I'm allergic so a bad comparison but we got the joke of the whole thing and he made us laugh really hard.

What else...oh ya!

We have had a sink problem for about 6 months where we can drain the sink upstairs because it leaks down into the laundry room right in between my washer and dryer. After us checking to see if we could fix it ourselves and being smart enough to say NO WE CAN'T  we asked the landlord, repeatedly so he comes over with a elderly gentleman to check. we already had a hole in the ceiling to check and see if we could have fixed it ourselves,  and there was a hole in the pipe . The 2 men check and decide that WE should cut a bigger hole for them and they'll put something over the hole to fix it. I don't care, whatever... FIX MY SINK!

We cut the hole ( Bean had happy fun time with the hammer that day ) and the landlord said OK I'll be there on Sat to fix it. OH JOY! I took my sink for granted but after bailing water out of it for 6 months doing dishes my arms are solid! ( Well, the right one is.) They come over on Sat and I looked at the old guy and pointed out a few rust spots on the pipe and asked "Will these be an issue?" He reached up with his thumb and pushed gently. *THUNK* it went right through. He turned and looked at me then simply said "Yes, I think they will be. You need a Plumber"

Blink...Blink...What?

"I need a plumber? Well what are you?" I asked and again simple he says "Not a plumber." I looked at my landlord who was arguing about really needing a plumber. That didn't last long but we would have to wait a few more days.

Ugh....

Besides that we are trying to put on a Virtual Garage Sale! This is a work in progress but we're going to see if it works! I took me a whole day of trying to re-size a photo that I wanted to upload  I spent Saturday Update and trying to revamp my various Social Media pages ( what a chore ) I finally had to ask Sese to do it and in like 2 minutes she had it sorted for me. At least I try it before I have to call in the rescue team and that can be any of the kids!

Let me know if the text is too hard to read with the background or offer up an idea for me and we'll see if it works.

This must have been how my mom felt asking me to work the DVD player when she got her first one back in 1990 something.

I think that's it for now..that I can think of.

Have a great week!
See ya,
S


Monday, May 12, 2014

A Mother's Work Is Never Done...No Really Never...



Hello Lovelies,

Yesterday was Mother's Day and it was very mellow for us around the house. Not that it wasn't a good one but I had to battle a Caffeine headache for most of the day. Since it was a headache from a lack of caffeine over the weekend I was hoping coffee would help but... that didn't work at all. It was one of those ones that you thought was a fully functioning with ache until you stand up and your head pounds so hard you feel sick and yet NOT a migraine. The only thing I thought we had in the house to take for it were T1's and I didn't want to take them because codeine knocks me right out, like sleeping leaning up against a door frame, drooling, snoring like a tug boat...out.

 My head had me parked on the couch, in my pj's for the day watching movies like Scott Pilgrim Saves the World, Blade Trinity, Resident Evil 3 and 4 and finally Res Evil Damnation until Bean let me know she had Aspirin! Aspirin! I haven't taken that since I was a kid and it was the tiny little orangy children's Aspirin that tasted absolutely awful yet still a loving childhood memory for me of when my mom used to take care of me.

Brat...make your mother suffer all day!! That's OK you're forgiven because you ended up taking care of me!

Despite that I was in pretty good spirits...as long as I laid perfectly still, only moved my eyes and didn't laugh.
Which was hard because the girls make me laugh everyday and laughing is good for the soul. Sese and her strange little dances and hair pets as she offered to make me food...and she can't cook so that was a big thing!

My kids are also not opposed to making me suffer every once in while. OK that and the stupid clown picture that is circulating Face book of the IT Clown, creepiest F*****G thing EVER! that my girls both, at separate times mind you, tagged to me because they know I HATE CLOWNS! Two other people caught me with the same clown previously too. They scare me to death and yes I know, Clowns are happy they bring smiles! Bullshit! Their smiles are creepy, their shoes are too big and those noses...deadly!! (As per Killer Clowns From Outer Space) and a car should never fit that many creepy ass, big haired serial killers. Even Ronald McDonald creeped me out as a kid and where is he now huh?

 No thanks...I'll pass and you forever suck for torturing your mother with that but I love you anyway.

By the time I felt better it was late in the day but I was back to yelling at the dogs, drinking cup after cup of coffee and fending off a serious craving for Nachos.

The day was all I wanted even in sickness and they produced the smiles for me and stimulating conversations about hair and potential zombie apocalypses.

Don't ask...

I hope all of you other mother's had a fabulous day!

See ya
S


Tuesday, May 6, 2014

To Web MD or Not Web MD? Don't just don't!

Lovelies!

How was your weekend? Was it rainy and stormy preventing you from going out and doing the things you wanted to? Mine was and that didn't leave much to say here.

So all of last week I believe was fabulous until the weekend and we got screwed. And as I looked out of my of window...guess who's back! Oh ya the sun...

Quick question...How many of you Web diagnose yourselves? I'm guilty of it and in some cases it helped me and in others it horrified me and then thoughts of my impending painful death would occur.

For example, a while back I noticed that one of my fingernails looked odd like it was separated from the nail bed ( if only I had thought about that before looking online ) I got worried and looked it up...never do that... all of a sudden images, not a web diagnosis but images of horrible fungus' infected digits appeared before my eyes ( heart beats faster ) I swear for about an hour my head swirled thinking I had to go to the doctor and get needles or amputate my finger until my memory kicked in.

I have long nails and always have. Have you ever opened a can or a box with long nails? Sometimes the force you use pulls the nail away from the skin resulting in drum-roll please...

Separation from the nail bed! A sigh of relief was heard!

Lo had one of her tattoos touched up on Friday by the Awesome Aaron at Sinister Skin my Parlor of choice and yesterday she messaged me and said that she had blisters in the new ink and asked if that was normal. I had no idea! I've never had a touch up and who knows if it was normal so before I told her just to call the shop and ask, I asked the Internet...and again...NEVER DO THAT!

Images of blistery infected skin under ink and possible causes made me decide that no one is EVER touching any of my already inked skin so do it right the first time! Only because I didn't know what caused it. I turns out that after calling and doing what they told her to which was simply to stop putting lotion on it, the blisters went down and she felt relief!

I've had friends that use the Internet to figure out if something is seriously wrong with their children and then they rush them off only to find out that, gee whiz the Internet was wrong!

You know what really scares me though? There was a Walk in Clinic on the other side of our town and it was the only one for a long time so lots of people used it in a pinch, but the doctor there would enter the room...
with a laptop...
and Web diagnose his patients!

Making me wonder if that's where he learned to be a doctor in the first place. Sometimes it can be helpful you know by giving you suggestions on what could possibly be wrong, some not so fatal and hard core theories so be careful.

Seeing as I completely digressed from where this post was supposed to go in the first place I think I'm done for this week guys. I'll go back to looking out the window at the Sun...and cursing it for being here now and tormenting me.

Have a great week!
See Ya
S